Do you know exactly what your dad would love for the Father’s Day? Do you know his habits and tastes?
Perhaps, he has everything, and you are postponing the moment when you have to make a decision what to get him? What do you get a person who already has everything, right?
Or perhaps, you and your father are estranged, and you don’t need to worry about the Father’s Day at all?
Yes, a gift and a greeting card with nice words are a great thing to receive, yet there is much more precious gift that you absolutely CAN and CAN AFFORD to give to your father. It’s the gift of forgiveness.
It doesn’t matter whether you and your dad are on best terms, or you don’t speak to each other at all.
It doesn’t matter whether your dad is alive and well, or he has already passed on.
It doesn’t matter whether he is far away from you or close by.
We live in a spiritual reality and go through spiritual lessons, even if we don’t consciously know or remember this fact.
Do you know that your dad’s soul and you as a soul have chosen each other for this incarnation to support each other and to provide a spiritual lesson playground to each other?
Your dad could be the best dad in the world for you, and you are his little princess (even if you are a big princess already) or a daddy’s little boy (even you have overgrown this title long time ago), still, spiritually, you might be working out spiritual understanding and forgiveness of each other.
Like attracts like. You are together in this lifetime for a spiritual reason. So even if you believe there is nothing to forgive, and I do hope it is true for this lifetime, you must remember that there are many past lives (even if you personally don’t believe in them) when your relationships might not be so great and so happy. And maybe you must forgive your dad for whatever he has ever done to you in the long forgotten past.
In this case, forgiveness can seem a piece of cake. But you still have to work on it. Upcoming Father’s Day is a great reminder to get to work!
If you and your father have been estranged for any reason, including if he has done serious wrong by you, such as sexual abuse, severe neglect, refusal to accept you as his child, abandoning you, etc., that would be even stronger cause to get to the bottom of this forgiveness business. And it is actually not for your father, it is for YOU first and foremost.
In this case, I am sure your reluctance to forgive your father is very understandable, but only on the physical plane and from the point of view of a spiritually unaware human. See my blog article on what’s it like to be spiritually unaware (ignorant) HERE.
From the spiritual point of you, it’s actually the opposite. It is imperative to YOUR health, wealth and happiness to forgive your father for everything, no matter what had or hadn’t happened between you.
Let’s look at the negative situation from the spiritual point of view: Your father’s behavior in the past or in the present is a divine set up for your (and his) spiritual growth. It’s an initiation in love.
And if you make a decision to keep your anger, resentment and grudge inside, they can be compared to a hot coal. You intend to throw this hot coal at your father for whatever he had done to you; yet, instead, the coal burns you and burns you badly. The anger and unforgiveness are the huge boulders that keep an internal wall or a door closed to your vast wealth, radiant health, great relationships and strong and successful business or career success.
Unresolved anger, resentment and unforgiveness affect all areas of your life in active and very negative way.
And Karma is a serious teacher! If you don’t achieve your initiation in love with your father, you will be coming back again and again in other incarnations until you are so sick and tired of going through the same drama over and over so you will finally surrender and forgive. Why not to do it now? Save yourself lifetimes of heartbreak and emotional anguish!
If you watched a recent movie Shack, you saw that when Mack was going through his drama and then through the healing and release, one of the requirements was forgiveness of his very cruel father. Mack poisoned his father when he was 13.
But even with his father’s death, Mack was not free from their spiritual lesson. Later on, his son or daughter had to die (the daughter spiritually chose to die) to fulfil the Karmic balance. Yet, forgiveness was the most paramount for the health and happiness of everyone involved.
Read my blog article on how to stop self-judgment and judgment of others with an example from the Shack movie HERE.
When you are working on forgiveness, you don’t have to even talk to your father. As I mentioned earlier, he doesn’t have to be present geographically or to be alive. Forgiveness work is an energy work. It transcends time, incarnations and physical distance.
You can write a letter to your father and you don’t even need to mail it to him. Just burn it. Or mail it without an address.
You can talk to him, and he doesn’t even need to hear your words.
You can write forgiving affirmations over and over, and no one needs to see your doing it.
You can paint a picture of your feelings towards your father and burn it.
If you are sincere in your intention to forgive and take specific steps, your father will feel it energetically, and your relationship can and will improve dramatically.
Someone will say, my father is gone long time ago, everything that happened between us happened long time ago, and I don’t feel anything anymore. I have forgiven long time ago. Time healed.
Be careful saying that if you are the one who thinks this way. Without forgiveness work, time by itself doesn’t heal the wounds, time suppresses them.
If you never had done any healing/release/forgiveness work on your relationship with the father on the events that happened many long years ago, the trauma is still inside. It’s just hidden under layers and layers of suppressed pain, fear and anger.
Emotional pain is not felt anymore because it is buried under a hard shell. Even though you don’t feel pain anymore, it doesn’t mean the negative emotions don’t affect your life negatively. On the opposite, you are spending a lot of valuable energy to keep them buried and unnoticeable, yet, they are still active.
What needs to be done? Forgiveness work is prescribed!
Many people like to retort, “I forgave, but I will never forget!”
Yet, they are saying silent words to themselves at the same time: “No, you haven’t forgiven. Not even close! Don’t fool yourself,” pretending they don’t hear themselves. (And sadly, often they don’t.)
Here is a Litmus test to verify that you have truly forgiven your father (or anyone else, for that matter).
If you think or speak of him and feel at peace, true forgiveness has taken place.
However, if you feel numb, if you don’t really care one way or another, you are still suppressing pain.
And of course, if you feel any negative feelings whatsoever, in other words, you don’t feel 100 percent at peace, then more and more forgiveness is prescribed. Get to work!
Just remember the following spiritual principles:
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